Just Drive
by poeticgrace
Summary: Nathan and Peyton take a drive when life goes off track. ONE SHOT.


Nathan Scott has fallen in love exactly twice in his life, and if anyone asks, he always says that both times were with his wife. He doesn't talk about the first time or the fourth time – the two that he swears counts the most when he's really pressed by that inner dialogue playing in his head. He told himself at sixteen, when he stood there with Haley and promised to love her "forever and always," that anything that came before it didn't matter. And when he had his transgressions later on, he told himself that those things really didn't count. The one that did count was the one that Haley could never know about.

Sure, everyone knew that he had been with Peyton Sawyer first, the true golden couple of Tree Hill when they were mere sophomores. What was hotter than a star basketball player and his blonde cheerleader of a girlfriend? Sure, she was angsty and had a lot of baggage, but she understood the stuff that he had with his dad. He thinks sometimes that's what bonded them as friend as long as it did. She had understood him long before the rest of the world cared enough to look past more than the shiny toys that came with his father's wealth and the impressive stats he managed to put up week after week.

And then life had happened and she had met Lucas and the rest of high school changed everything. There were babies and proms, championships and accidents, shootings and breakups – all the usual drama plus a few things that were far from normal. Through it all, their group managed to stay mostly in tact, and for a brief shining moment senior year, Nathan could still see glimpses of the girl he had fallen for that lazy summer on the shore.

After college and his injury, it had been a rough year for both of them. Peyton eventually ended up married to his brother and moved away, just as Haley and Nathan saw their little boy starting to become this whole grownup person and celebrated their tenth anniversary. It seemed like a dream come true, though far from the idea he'd had in his head at sixteen. It's only when he's on the road with the Bobcats after Jamie turns eight that he realizes how easily he could lose all that. It's the last thing he expects when he comes off a nine-day stint all over the U.S. and see his brother's car parked outside his front door.

He can still remember the excitement he felt at the prospect of seeing his brother, sister-in-law and niece. Instead, he found his wife wrapped up in her best friend, hands roaming in places that they shouldn't be as the credits on some unknown movie rolled in the background. He barely managed to clear his throat as Haley pulled away, wiping at her mouth with the back of her hand. His first instinct is to go for Luke, but he stops himself short when he sees a photograph of his son just over his brother's shoulder. Haley screams in the yard as he drives away, and Nathan rolls up the window just to drown out the noise.

The first thing he does is call his mom to pick up Jamie and tells her that he'll be by in a few hours to pick up his son. He rattles off a quick text to Haley to inform her that he will be picking up his son and that she can make arrangements with him when she wants to see Jamie. He ignores the relentless beeping of his phone for the next twenty minutes as he drives around Tree Hill aimlessly, seeking a sign for direction. It's only when he sees the infamous black Comet stalled at a stoplight near the middle of town that Nathan feels like any of this real. His car is barely stopped when he leaps out and heads for Peyton, drawing stares from a pair of old women gossiping on the corner in front of the flower shop.

"Just drive," he says as soon as the door is shut. Peyton looks over at him and smiles, her face still red from the freshly fallen tears. She doesn't have to hear him ask twice before throwing the car into gear. She doesn't drive as recklessly now, not since her own daughter is buckled safely into her car seat in the back. Sawyer is asleep, a floppy hat pulled over her big green eyes, ones that are pure Peyton and not even a little Lucas. Nathan is glad for that as he looks over his shoulder and watches the little girl sleep for a moment. She's as beautiful as her mother.

Peyton cruises through town for a half-hour, both of them silent and not saying a word. She drives to their old spot, the beach house where they spent countless hours over the course of two years, and kills the engine just a few feet from the gravel path leading down to the seashore. "He's come back three times while you were gone over the past few months," she tells him softly, not daring to look at him but instead focusing on the ebb and flow of the ocean. "I heard him on the phone with her three days ago. He told me he was coming back to visit, and I thought I would surprise them so I brought Sawyer. I didn't expect to find them half-naked on your kitchen floor."

Nathan bites down hard on his bottom lip to keep himself from either cursing or sobbing uncontrollably, he's not exactly sure. "I got them making out on my couch, while they watched one of my DVDs on my 52-inch TV," he fills her in. "Did you have any idea?"

"None, not a single clue," she tells him honestly. "I've been a lot because of the label and stuff. I guess I haven't really been paying attention. I trusted my husband, you know. I never thought he would cheat on me, especially not with Haley. It's not high school, and she's not Brooke. Things are supposed to be different now, you know?"

He looks over at her and sees the tears have reappeared. He wants to comfort her but can't because he knows he's on the verge of shedding some himself. "I don't know why either of us would think that it should be different," he retorted bitterly. "Luke stole you from me. It only makes sense that he would eventually go after my wife."

Peyton's first reaction seems to be to defend Lucas, but she stops short of actually doing it. It didn't go down like that and they both know it, but that's not really the point after all these years. "All we can do is be good parents at this point," she told him sadly, looking absently out the window as she tucked a blonde tendril behind her ear. Her hair had returned to the straw blonde curls that had been present when she had been with Nathan all those years ago. It almost felt like old times being with her like this, the two of them against the world. He couldn't even count how many nights he had spent in this car. "Nate, I'm really sad."

"I'm pretty sad too, Peyt," he admits. "What do you say we drop off Sawyer with her godmother and you and I head out to that dive bar on the edge of town? My mom has Jamie. I promise I won't drink. I just want to get out of here. I need to feel a little reckless. You need to be a little reckless."

Peyton slid her cell phone over to Nathan to make arrangements, and ten minutes later, Brooke was cooing over her sleeping goddaughter. She tried to ask what Peyton was doing in town and why Nathan was with her, but neither of them would say much. Peyton only said, "Ask Lucas," bitterly before grabbing Nathan by the wrist and jetting back out to the Comet. "We'll be back into town late. You can keep her over night. I will come by in the morning. Call me if there are problems or call Luke's cell. Thanks, Brooke!"

They spent the next several hours telling their sad stories as Peyton downed beer after beer, shot after shot, while Nathan adhered to his promise of just soda. He was still sober after that bad year and knew that now would be a bad time to test his ability to have just one beer. He enjoyed watching her get lost in the alcohol, knowing how rare those wild nights had become since Sawyer was born. They sat close together in a corner booth. When someone slid a quarter in the jukebox and started to play classic rock favorites, Peyton managed to drag Nathan out to the middle of the floor to dance. It was only when someone selected an old country song that he dared to pull her close. Peyton came willingly enough, resting her head on his shoulder and allowing her hands to find a home around his neck while he held her near to him.

"What are we going to do when the morning comes?" she asked as the song transitioned to another old ballad. Nathan closed his eyes and inhaled her subtle scent. It was comforting and felt like home, this familiar thing that he had known for years. "Nate, things can't go back to the way they were, you know? I don't think I can forgive Luke this time. He wouldn't have messed around with Haley if it was just casual. How am I supposed to love him after all this?"

"I wish I knew, Peyt," he confessed. He pulled back enough to look down into her wide eyes. "I will always love Haley because of Jamie, but this changes everything. She had to know what this would do to us, and she made a very conscious decision to betray both of like this. There is no coming back from this, not for me. It's not up to me to forgive. It's up to me to let go. Hales did this to us, and now, we are all going to have to live with the consequences."

"No one more than Jamie and Sawyer," she said softly. "I guess the part that helps in all of this is that I don't have to go through this alone. I hate that this is happening to you, Nate, but if it is, I am glad we have each other."

"Me too, Peyt," he admitted before brushing a kiss over her forehead. "If it weren't for you, I probably could have killed Luke tonight. I just couldn't do that to you or to Sawyer. Jamie loves his Uncle Luke. This is so fucked up, you know? I hate him for doing this. I hate her. I hate everything."

She stopped dancing then and looked at him for a moment before wrapping her arms around him tightly. She stood on tip toes and just squeezed him tightly. She needed for him to understand that it was okay to hate them and to hate the situation. She needed him to get that she felt it. Most of all, she needed him to know that she was there for him, even if she was a mess herself. "We're gonna get through this, Nate, I promise," she whispered. "You have me. I have you. They can have each other. We're the ones getting the better end of the deal."

"Oh, yeah?" he asked with a wry laugh, cocking an eyebrow to illustrate his skepticism. "You gonna go back with me and help me face the music in the morning, then? This is kind of the ending of a lot."

"I was there in the beginning, Nate, and I will certainly be there in the end," she reminded him. "Besides, we're the ones who started all of this anyways. Before there was Naley and Leyton, there was Neyton. Remember when Brooke used to call us that?" Nathan laughed as he thought about that year of high school when they were the biggest thing to hit Tree Hill since his own parents had ruled the high school years before. "We were pretty good together."

"We were horrible together. That's what you always said in high school."

"Maybe I was wrong..."

"Maybe you were right and you were wrong," he decided. "It doesn't matter. That was the past. We'll figure out the future tomorrow. For now, for tonight, I just want to enjoy what's right here in front of me. I just want to appreciate having one more dance with you."

_**Fin.**_


End file.
